The only quick fix there is out there is liposuction. So unless you’re willing to pay up, I suggest you stop being a lazy fucker and get off the damn couch.
Part of the problem here is that people are so focused on numbers. This is why you are failing. You’re either focused on the numbers on the scale or the numbers on your clothes. Sometimes both. You can’t do that. I’ve recently come across some trolls on the interwebs that kept bringing up the word ‘normal’ when referring to body type/weight. And I’ve even seen people saying that anyone size 12 and over is overweight. O.O Can we please put all the stupid people on an island and move on with our lives?
What does that even mean? It means nothing, at least, not in the sense that people are using it. Try this… Normal is whatever works for you. That’s it. That’s all there is to it. If you feel comfortable in your skin and your health couldn’t be better, then you’re normal. And since everyone is different, everyone’s normal is going to be different. Do yourself a favour and stop comparing yourself to other people. It will only do you harm.
Remember when everyone used to say that Marilyn Monroe was a size 16? Oh wait, people still say that. Well that’s false. Sort of. A size 16 in her time is probably something close to a size 10 now. What’s that you say? It’s vanity sizing is what I’m saying. If the measurements we all see on clothing really meant something, then why can I be a 16 in one store and a 12 in another? That makes no sense. I can literally go into five different stores and be five different sizes. (They also have sizing in odd numbers.) This is just crazy.
Women say they want equality eh? Then man up and start going by our measurements rather than the made up numbers that the stores are selling you. Some stores already do that, and I love it cause I don’t have to waste my time trying on three pairs of the same pants. Or I can just walk right out once I realize that they don’t even have my size. You can’t lose.
Now that that’s out of the way.
Let’s go back to getting healthy. Healthy eating and exercise. That’s all. So simple and yet so complicated.
Living in North America, I know firsthand how difficult it is to eat healthy. Any and everything you buy prepared is full of chemicals that the human body was never meant to consume. And if you’re buying unprepared food to cook with, they’re full of harmful pesticides. And don’t talk to me about organic food. Organic means nothing here. Two farms right beside each other. One uses pesticides and the other one doesn’t. Hey, guess what? They’ve both got pesticides in their crops. Your best bet is growing food in your backyard. But with 51% of Torontonians - (I'm assuming similar numbers in other urban areas.) - living in an apartment/condo or something, the situation becomes that much more complicated.
Location is key, and unfortunately most of us are screwed. But there is hope. So here’s what we do…
1. Stop buying processed food.
I know it sounds difficult, but trust me, homemade cookies are a million times better than the store bought crap. Homemade sweet potato fries? Yes please. And that brings us to…
2. Learn how to cook.
This generation is so fucking lazy. Why can't you cook? I’ve been taking free cooking classes for the past couple of months. And I took classes when I was a child. There are options out there. Get on the net and find them.
3. Go to a farm.
If you live within 30 minutes of a farm of any kind, you have no reason to be buying what’s available on that farm in the grocery store. Produce or meat, it doesn’t matter. You know it’s fresh, and you’re helping out the environment if you’re buying tomatoes locally as opposed to the ones that are being shipped in from elsewhere. And on top of all of that, food dyes and such are used on certain foods to make them look fresher for when they get to the grocery store. No thanks.
4. Shop smart.
You’re not always going to have time to cook everything from scratch. This is not a perfect world. Check the labels. What’s in the “food” that you’re about to buy? Notice that sugar and salt are in almost everything? Try buying stuff with the least amount of ingredients, least amount of sugar and the least amount of salt.
5. Drink water.
I’m going to tell you how much water to drink but you should be drinking it often. This is nothing new, we’ve all heard it before. So do it! Don’t like the lack of taste of water? Drink some tea or add some fresh fruit to your water bottle. Problem solved. No excuses.
Almost done talking about food.
I can’t stand it when I hear people complain about how bland or boring eating healthy is. Or that the food doesn’t taste good. WTF is wrong with you? Here are some pictures that I recently reblogged or liked on tumblr.
Don't forget the snacks...
CHOP APPLES / MICROWAVE FOR A FEW MINUTES / ADD HONEY AND CINNAMON
WHOLE WHEAT BREAD (TOASTED)
CHOBANI 0% VANILLA GREEK YOGURT
STRAWBERRIES & BANANAS
CHIA SEEDSSearch the ‘healthy food’ tag on tumblr for more.
Going out for dinner?
Dressing on the side.
Don’t feel like you have to finish everything on the plate.
Do you really need dessert? If you’re gonna go for it, share.
Here comes the exercise.
This doesn’t have to be painful. I’m telling you to go from zero to P90X. In fact I suggest that you don't do that. Start slow. P90X comes later. (If you want.) Start walking. Ten minutes a day. Work your way up. This is the best way to get to your ‘normal’. Don’t like walking? Take a yoga class, dance class, pilates class. Get on a bike, go swimming learn a new sport. There is something out there for everyone. No excuses.
I’m not at my normal. I’m not my healthiest. And yet here I am. I was able to put this blog post together. Which only leads to two conclusions; this is common sense and since we’re not doing all of this, we’re lazy.
So stop being lazy and start using your common sense. But remember, eating healthy and exercising don’t work without each other. You may be physically fit, but if all you’re eating is crap, don’t be surprised when you get that heart attack. And if all you do is eat all day but sit on your ass and watch TV, you’re not going to be in shape.
So there it is. Our guide to getting healthy. If I've missed anything, feel free to leave a comment and let me and everyone know.
Thanks for reading.